Monday, December 14, 2009
I, like most women, have a tough first trimester of pregnancy. At this point during my first pregnancy, I was completely freaking out! Between the nausea, the indescribable daily exhaustion and the countless other side effects that no one ever warns you about, I wondered if having a baby was the biggest mistake of my life. How in the world would I function with a baby when I couldn't even get myself dressed for the day? Fortunately this time around I'm armed with the knowledge that this "phase", this "I think I want to die just climbing the stairs" feeling...well...it passes and somewhere around 16 weeks, I start to feel normal again. Normal with a huge belly that is. I get my energy back, accompanied by back pain, leg pain, and little sleep...but I have more energy. Of course this only lasts until week 30 or 32 and that's when the real fun begins...swelling, no sleep, constant pain, itching, and eventually liver and kidney failer....oh...what have I done to myself!!! Suddenly it's all coming back to me.
They say you forget...that's why you do it again...you forget. But I haven't forgotten. I remember as plain as day. And quite honestly, I'm a little terrified.
But there's good news...I have this beautiful, sweet, lovable little face, with big brown eyes staring at me, as I type. She reminds me daily why this is worth it. Why me and millions of women everywhere do this over and over again. Why we transform our lives and figures for the thankless, miraculous title of "Mom"!
Today I'm 9 weeks pregnant, and I spent all morning laying on the couch feeling like I wanted to throw up. My sweet baby girl laid next to me watching Sesame Street. Finally at about 11:30 I got up and got us dressed for the day. I even managed to make my bed and clean up from Breakfast. I've now made lunch for little "R" and she's ready for a nap. Some people may say I haven't accomplished much today, but this has actually been a good day.